ALTERNATE TITLE: An Honest Review of Marvel Team-Up #14
Spider-Man! He's always there for me, he's almost like a real dad. He's been in a lot of comics for over 60 years, and he's had a lot of crossovers over the years. Earlier this year we took a look at Spidey's crossover with Ren & Stimpy. But that was also under Marvel Editorial, let's take a look at a crossover with characters from another comic book publisher... Invincible from Image Comics.
Way back in the 1990s, a lot of artists and writers left Marvel and DC to start a new company where creators actually got paid. Some of these creations were Spawn (by Todd McFarlane), Savage Dragon (by Erik Larsen), Youngblood (by Linkara's worst enemy... ROB LIEFELD), and Invincible (Robert Kirkman).
Invincible's probably their most popular creation, seeing as how there's a TV show with multiple seasons on Amazon Prime. Every time an episode comes out, people will go apeshit as if they're watching a football game. But what about me? Does the superhero guy like Invincible? Eh... Not really. Never really got into his comics OR his show, and my knowledge of his story is really limited. But hey, if everyone says this is the best comic ever then it must be true!
He's the son of the world's greatest superhero... I didn't know Nova had a son! Also, to me it sounds like this guy's only a superhero because of nepotism.
Anyway, Marvel Team-Up was a series about Marvel characters teaming up... DUH! However, it was always Spider-Man and some other character. The series ended around the 70's and 80's... Until it was revived in the mid to late 90's and ended again. But then in 2005 it was revived again, and this time Spider-Man wasn't always the main character!
In issue 14, Spider-Man teams up with... Guess who... No, you gotta guess... Barry The Quokka? I wish... It was Invincible.
Well, this issue was written by Robert Kirkman, and the art was drawn by Ryan Ottley, who went on to draw more issues of Invincible and a few issues of the fifth volume of The Amazing Spider-Man. Neato.
Let's look at reviews for this issue to see what the critics think. Spider-Fan.org says this issue gets 0.5 webs. Well, that's a glowing review. Those hacks at League of Comic Geeks give this issue a 98/100, but they're probably nerds that would eat shit if it had Invincible in it, so I don't take their opinion. Goodreads.com gives this issue 4.25 out of 5 stars. Well, it seems like SpiderFan is the only website with a bad review. But you can't take their word as fact, you have to take MY opinion as pure objective fact, so let's take a look at Marvel Team-Up (vol. 3) #14.
Of course, I always make sure that I don't read anything from pirated sites, so I did my best to track down a copy of this issue, and guess what? I have one on Kindle. Let's take a look at what else I have.
Let's play a game: What do these comics have in common apart from them being comic books, having Spider-Man and having a Marvel logo in them? Well, the fact that they're all shit. But they're all shit for completely different reasons. The FCBD special is shit because it's just not that good, and Gwenpool pissed me off, so I don't look at her comics anymore. But why is this team-up shit? Well, I don't know yet, I just felt like calling it that.
This issue takes place between- I don't care.
Spider-Man is fighting Doc Ock, okay, nothing out of the ordinary, but then some random portal appears and Invincible is transported and knocks out Doc Ock... Okay, this is out of the ordinary. Well, they both have a nice greeting and they both stop Doc Ock.
UH-OH, the police are here, and Spidey has to get away, so Invincible picks him up by the armpits and takes him to a nearby rooftop. They both talk about their lives or whatever. And it's here where we get the stupidest scene in the comic, Invincible criticizes Spider-Man's hero name. They both have pretty solid arguments, but I think both names are equally stupid as shit. Not unlike my internet username, you have no idea how much time I spent coming up with that.
Spider-Man is just like "You kids today..." even though he would eventually say something along the lines of "That's no reason you can't use current slang like 'Rizz' or 'Zaddy'", so I don't think he has a leg to stand on.
Spidey decides to take a complete stranger to the Avengers tower. This is where Invincible meets the NEW Avengers.... Shit, I have to explain who they are now, you see, the New Avengers appeared because... Shit, I don't know, I look like a fool now.
Whoops, they have to go now! Doc Ock is on the loose again! Well, Spidey has stopped him like 4000 times but for some reason he now needs Invincible's help... Okay. Anyway, they stop him and Invincible goes back to his universe, the story continues on Issue 33 of Invincible, but I'm a Marvel reader and I don't have the time to actually read another publication, so let's just say Invincible killed whoever sent him to another universe and after that he ate a burger but choked on one of the pickles and died.
This story was pretty uneventful, it's not as bad as SpiderFan.org says it is but it's pretty boring. I'd say it gets a 5/10. It is fucking mid. But at the same time, I didn't really expect much from a Team-Up, I wasn't expecting a multiple issue team-up story, so I guess it's alright.
Believe it or not, this issue was actually adapted into the cartoon! That's right, they actually had Invincible travel to another universe and team up with... Not Spider-Man! Well, I guess Amazon tried to get Marvel to let them use Spider-Man in their show, but I guess they declined or something. So, in order to salvage the episode, they had Agent Spider! And they only had him appear for 1 whole scene! One might wonder why they spent so much time teasing Spider-Man if he WASN'T gonna appear in the show but hey, at least I didn't look like a fucking fool in denial for once.
Well, the review is over, and the year is also almost over, so let's look to the future. What is the review slate for 2025?
Well, the big mini-series review of the year is gonna be "Coming Home" from volume 2 of The Amazing Spider-Man.
Another big review is the first 10 issues of The Amazing Spider-Man (vol. 1) but revisited!
2025 is packed with Spider-Man reviews, guest writer Camden has been tasked with reviewing the first arc of Ultimate Spider-Man (2000)
The big June review, it is time I reveal what the greatest comic of all time really is...
Later, bye nerds.
Send fan-mail to eddiespiderplushfanmail@gmail.com
Comments